Dating a man who has been sexually abused
Let your girlfriend know that you do care about what she wants and doesn’t want.
Make sure you ask her consent each and every time the two of you are intimate.
There are no clear set of “rules” that will work for every person, so it’s important for you to ask your girlfriend what she needs from you as her partner.
You don’t want to make any assumptions about her experiences or needs.
Keep in mind that asking for and giving consent can actually be really beautiful. Together, come up with phrases that sound special to both of you.
And of course, don’t do anything without getting a clear go-ahead from her.
Tell her you’re open to hearing any parts of her story that she feels comfortable telling you. You don’t want to put her on the spot or pepper her with questions, but let her know you care and want to be there for her in any way that feels good for her.
But how often do we hear the nitty-gritty of how we can actually better understand our deepest desires and most embarrassing questions?You sound like a sensitive person who wouldn’t want to put pressure on your girlfriend to do anything she doesn’t want to do.That being said, the topic of pressure can feel exceedingly delicate for many sexual abuse survivors.It helps the partner understand more about what their partner is experiencing, and how they can work together to create a sex life that feels satisfying.There are also lots of great exercises you can do together to help your girlfriend feel more comfortable and safe.