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But then when you get older, you see how all these little pieces actually fit together.But the great thing that I found is that women seem to be extraordinarily good at knowing themselves and what will work for them eventually in their life.the happily ever after…if the happily ever after doesn’t work out. ”The last thing that Bushnell wanted to do after her divorce was look for love.“I went through a period where I absolutely did not believe in relationships at all,” she explained.“We’re not Okcupid; we don’t have a million users,” Asher said, before adding, “not yet.” Extensive programming experience and frustration with online dating led to this unique dating project.Coding since he was 11 years old, Asher began working as a software professional when he moved away from home at the young age of 14.

From his own inbox he witnessed the widespread discouragement that singles felt.

“I think it’s really important to question all of these societal expectations…as a woman we do have to think about where we put our time.

You can put a lot of time and energy into a relationship and come out with less…that’s another reality. And nobody wants to talk about it, but that’s life. When you’re younger, it feels like life is going in just one direction.

“There is no way around it.” It’s not like it has to hit a bunch of markers—like you have to get married. ”Bushnell did not get to explore everything she wanted to in , and is grateful that the book is being adapted into a TV series—which she anticipates will give her ample opportunity to analyze other kinds of middle-age relationships. ”Bushnell loves piercing through relationship pretenses to grapple with these direct questions. But money becomes a reality, and a concern in a way that it wasn’t when you were younger. And it’s better to accept that it’s life rather than make a value judgment on it and just get through it.”Tinder may have once felt foreign to this dating anthropologist—but Bushnell has now steeled herself for a world in which the romantic landscape gets even stranger.

“One of the things that I would love to explore that we did not in the book is a woman who stayed married, and maybe her friends are divorced and having a really good time,” Bushnell explained. In her book, she writes with surprising frankness about a friend’s unapologetic decision to marry for money—a subject the author wishes wasn’t so taboo. One of the things that I would like to look at more…yes, people talk about sex. “I don’t want to criticize the times we live in, or the technology, [which is only] increasing exponentially,” said Bushnell.

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